April 3, 2012

The Year in Tweets: Movies

Follow me at twitter.com/thegreatwebber

Somewhere: A movie of moments, tiny & miraculous. Nothing happens, yet everything does. The most Sofia Coppola-esque Sofia Coppola film yet.

Blue Valentine: From the performances to the music, this film destroyed me. I gotta warn you, this movie hurts.

Catching up on cartoons: Despicable Me (great) & Cloudy w/ a Chance of Meatballs (good). The fact that I'm watching cartoons (spectacular).

Sucker Punch: Pros: Hot chicks kicking ass in slo-mo. Cons: Everything else.

Adjustment Bureau: Talky characters dumb down intriguing premise. Everything is explained! Eternal Sunshine of the Manchurian Candidate?

Limitless: Filmmakers show limited imagination. Drugs & guns & paper-thin characters. Thrilling enough, but coulda (shoulda?) been better.

Rango: Old West critters amused me immeasurably.

Source Code: Can he get the girl & defuse the bomb in 8 mins... again? Groundhog Day + MacGruber = warm-hearted thrill ride, surprisingly.

Hanna: The latest in the cute lil assassin genre. Kill Bill + Nell = Visually striking, vengefully appealing fairytale. Killer soundtrack!

Lincoln Lawyer: Courtroom drama w/ actual drama. Matthew McConaughey + shirt (+ suit + tie) = career redemption.

Jane Eyre: I expected staid, I got smoldering, w/ typical walks thru gloomy moors. I bet the book is better tho.

Jane Eyre: I haven't read the book, but I saw the movie. I just became the person I hate.

I can't wait to NOT see Fast Five this weekend!

Burlesque: The midpoint between Chicago & Showgirls. In other words, a 2-hr Xtina Aguilera video.

Scream 3: 1D characters, flat script, same-y deaths, implausible killer, Jenny McCarthy speaking... Now I remember why I forgot this flick.

If Scream 4 isn't better, expect a documentary in which I stab everyone responsible for this atrocity. #Scream5

Scream 4: Fun, more or less. But the scariest thing about it was Courtney Cox's new face.

Win Win: Family wrestles w/ family & wrestling. More heart-warming than -breaking. Victorious.

The Beaver: Mel, Jodie & puppet act crazy, sad & beautiful. More comedic, humane & relatable than expected.

Super 8: Homemade zombies, bicycling kids, nuclear suburbia, widescreen nostalgia. No better film for a summer afternoon.

Bridesmaids: Kristen Wiig mugs for the camera w/ grace. Hilarious, sure, but also heartfelt.

Meek's Cutoff: Oregon Trailers get lost, scared, resolute. Scenery gets gorgeous. Dialogue gets terse.

Michelle Williams: If not the best, the most fearless actress of her generation.

Tree of Life: Too immense to be tweeted about. Trying seems futile, but... the movie was miraculous?

Harry Potter 7.2: Beloved series ends gracefully.

Seeing Hary Potter 7.2 at midnight w/ caffeinated friends & costumed strangers: Magical.

Horrible Bosses: Not a horrible comedy. Several laughs, hot Jen, enjoyable enough everything else.

ILoveUPhillipMorris: Carrey's gay conman schtick was either endearing or endurance test. Quirkiness mostly entertained, but not entirely.

Everything Must Go: Slight story, but subdued, soulful Will Ferrell sells it. Everyone must watch? Maybe not, but good anyway.

Moneyball: Pitt, Hill, A's dopplegangers make stats seem vital. Almost as good as actual game, almost as good as book. Inside baseball!

Drive: Man-crushable Gosling drives, fights, listens to 80s synth-pop in great bad film. Artsy, sleazy, cool.

Contagion: Stars fight flu or burn out trying. Invisible antagonist thrills & chills. Worldwide scare hits close 2 home. This film is sick!

The Help: Finally saw it. Acting was superb, story was typical Hollywood liberal bait. It'll clean up at the Oscars.

The Help: So yeah, I mostly liked it, I guess. But the question remains: How would Dave Chappelle mock it?

50/50: Cancer story is half funny, half poignant, all JGL goodness.

Take Shelter: Small indie film packs apocalyptic punch. Is local man crazy or prophet? The stuff of nightmares, in the best way possible.

Michael Shannon: The go-to guy for crazy. Jessica Chastain: Best year ever?

Ides of March: A+ actors play pols and/or pawns. Slickness leaves me feeling slimy. Maybe not perfect, but damn diverting.

Bridesmaids: Even funnier the 2nd time. Melissa McCarthy: Performance of the year?

MarthaMarcyMayMarlene: Olsen sister breaks out of cult (in the film), obscurity (in real life). Indie intensity keeps creeping up...

MyWeekWithMarilyn: All the other critics were right. Williams as Monroe was radiant, but the rest of the film was light.

The Muppets & Hugo: These 2 movies rekindled my love of old movies, movies in general & these 2 movies in particular.

Hugo: Scorsese film is surprisingly fun for the whole family! Storybook world is full of wonder.

Hugo: 1st time I saw a film in 3D. Worth the $. Not a gimmick, but a deep immersion. I felt like I was there in that Paris train station.

Muppets: Ode to joy.

Descendants: Clooney shined bright as Hawaii sun. But story around him seemed forced, false. Some sweet moments, but kinda disappointing.

Pearl Jam 20: Performances thrill. Band interviews bore. There's no internal drama in this band.

Senna: Absolutely thrilling documentary about race car driver. U might not think you'll care, but u will. 1 of the best movies of the yr.

Young Adult: D Cody's most grownup work + C Theron's nuanced descent into depression + J Reitman's trademark breezy direction =

Young Adult: = a film that's been stuck in my head for days like one of my favorite sad songs. I want to wallow in this world.

Melancholia: So melancholic an audience member walked out. But THIS audience member was completely blown away. Beauty in sadness. Epic.

MI4: Exotic locales, cool spy technology, crazy stunts & a ridiculous plot. Yup. Just another fun yet forgettable Mission Impossible pic.

Cave of Forgotten Dreams: Documentary about cave paintings digs deep. Why do we draw? Why do we dream? Spelunking = scintillating.

The Artist: A glorious tribute to black & white movies, silent movies, all movies, and life itself. Uplifting!

Midnight in Paris: Woody's funniest, most humane, downright likeable movie in years. Perfect for film fans, lit majors.

War Horse: It's beautifully shot, expertly crafted, but... There's a war. And a horse. And a symbol of purity.

ExtremelyLoud: Mostly avoids doomy pitfalls -- lit adaptation, 9/11 story, precocious kid, puzzles -- to move me. Not worth the hate.

With a double feature on Saturday, I've now seen all of this year's Best Picture nominees. From 1 to 9, I liked em as follows...

1-TreeofLife, 2-TheArtist, 3-Moneyball, 4-MidnightinParis, 5-Hugo, 6-ExtremelyLoud, 7-WarHorse, 8-TheDescendants, 9-TheHelp.

RiseofthePlanetoftheApes: CGI ape is more human than human. Exciting, moving, better than expected.

Buck: Man tames horses & humans who own them. Another surprisingly moving doc.